Emotions
by asa-chan
Summary: Where do emotions come from? Kai always asked himself that and never found an answer... but his answer may lay in Takao... Shonen Ai


**Emotions**

A Beyblade Fanfiction 

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_By asa-chan_

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**Warning:** Shonen Ai, PG, fluff and a little bit of angst 

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**Pairing:** Kai/Takao 

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**Disclaimer:** Listen up, I never ever owned Bakuten Shoot Beyblade and never ever will. 

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"Blah" - Speaking 

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_'Blah'_ Thinking 

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**-One Shot-**

Why do people have emotions? Why do they feel? Why? 

Kai always asked himself that. And never found an answer. 

Wouldn't it be better, if anyone would be emotionless? Not being able to feel those unpleasant emotions like hurt, pain, regret, guilt, rage, betrayal and hate? Wouldn't the world be better if anyone would be without any feelings, so no living human could be hurt again and again and again? It would benefit mankind, wouldn't it? 

After all, the feelings of a human were the things, which would hurt most in their lifetime. 

And Kai didn't like being hurt and emotional. All his feelings, all his emotions... Those were the cause of his pain, the aching of his heart, the feeling of loneliness. Kai didn't want to feel pain anymore. He wanted to be happy..., but happiness ...is also an emotion. Full of lies, so easily shattered, broken into thousands pieces, so worthless and Kai wouldn't be able to fix this. 

So, he didn't want to be happy.... 

But still...., sometimes happiness....was soothing....helping Kai and his heart, making him feel alive...... 

But where do emotions come from, he remembered asking as a little child and Voltaire slapping him after that... 

He remembered, that as a child, he jumped to the conclusion, that heart and emotion together in one sentence was something bad, something that would hurt him only more. 

So Kai didn't bring up that subject again. He was a smart boy, after all. 

Everyone, his teachers, his associates, his lackeys, his team-mates and Takao said emotions came from the heart, from his soul. But he read in the lexicon that '**_The heart's function is to pump blood to all parts of the body through blood vessels called veins and arteries. The blood carries oxygen and nutrients to all body cells and carries waste products like carbon dioxide away from the cells to be removed from the body.'_**

The heart was supposed to keep the body alive. But what about a human's emotion? 

They had to be lying. Emotions simply can't come from the heart. It was impossible. 

And the most painful thing of all was that even Takao lied to him... Young, trusting, innocent Takao.... 

Once again Kai felt hurt. Why did Takao, of all people, have to hurt him? Kai immediately hated himself for feeling the pain, for being so weak. Takao had told him a lie. So, what? But a tiny part of him, the part which was still alive and able to feel, cried, quietly, but still it wept, hurting, hurting..... 

And at this point, Kai asked himself, what was the point of having emotions? 

He never wanted to feel again, but still he was wondering where do emotions come from? Maybe they came from the soul.... Did he have a soul? And if so, where did it go? 

He wanted it back.... Did he? Did he really want his soul back, where his emotions came from? 

Silly Kai, he told himself, chuckling without any humor. You still feel something, so the soul wasn't the source of emotions. 

Did that mean that Takao and the others hadn't lied to him? 

Kai was confused, too scared to ask, afraid of the answer..., but yet, he was curious... 

Those damned emotions! 

Kai was supposed to be emotionless, just like his hated grandfather ordered him to be. So why was Kai feeling those useless, worthless, unimportant emotions! It was Takao's fault! 

Kai's whole confused rage, his vulnerable anger exploded and he wanted to take it out on someone. And who was the best person for venting his anger out? 

Takao always forgave him in the end... 

Kai knew he shouldn't take things for granted. He knew, that even the compassion of Takao would fade someday away, turning to nothingness..., but he couldn't help himself, but stalking up to Takao's room, boiling with rage..., red eyes narrowed into tiny slits. 

"Takao! Open up! It's me!" Kai's loud voice echoed in the empty hallway. 

No answer 

"Takao! Open the door right now!" The captain of the Bladebreakers yelled with his 'I am pissed off' voice, slamming his hand against the doorframe. 

"TAKAO!" 

Still no response 

Kai was now getting furious. 

"Open up now or I will kick your door in!" He threatened, balling his large hands into fists, a vein pulsing on his fore-head. 

Everything was silent, except for Kai's heavy breathing. 

"Okay, if it is that you want....!" Kai barked and put his hand against the door and it went open with a slight creak...? 

Kai sweatdropped slightly and peeked into the room, frowning. He squinted his eyes because of the darkness in the room and finally caught sight of a small lump on the bed. 

Was that soft snoring he could hear? Kai bit his lower lip and stealthily moved towards the bed, trying not to make any sound. 

When he'd finally arrived; he dimly could see Takao, who had thrown himself on the covers of the bed. Fully clothed, only his hair was out of it's usual ribbon, framing his face in soft waves. 

Takao was breathing steadily, sound asleep. Kai's eyes softened and he smoothed back a bang out of Takao's face, while his own had a neutral expression. 

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_'Guess I have to wait before I can yell at Takao. He is sleeping so peacefully now, I simply can't wake him up.... I don't have the heart to do that.'_ Kai thought resignedly and ran a hand through his slate-gray hair. Kai froze, after thinking about his last thought. 

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_'I don't have the heart to do something that cruel...., does that mean, emotions really come from the heart, just like Takao told me? He wasn't lying, he had told me the truth...., geez, I'm such a dork...'_ Kai thought to himself, embarrassed about ever doubting Takao's words. 

He sighed tiredly and threw himself on the bed, next to Takao. He smiled gently at his sleeping teammate and touched the blunette's face, red eyes warm with love. 

"I'm sorry..." Kai whispered and closed his eyes, basking in the closeness of Takao and the pleasant scent of his warm body. But he stiffened when Takao turned around and threw his tanned arms around Kai's waist, nuzzling his head against Kai's broad chest. 

The red-eyed boy blushed to his roots and hesitantly brought his arms around Takao, his face resembling a ripe tomato. 

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_'Guess I deserve being your personal plushie after doubting you Takao, eh? But I don't mind at all..... I'm getting rather sleepy too...'_

"Hey, you have nothing against me joining you, do you?" No answer. "That's good.... Good night...." Kai yawned and closed his eyes, falling into a deep slumber. 

Takao opened his eyed slowly and smiled at Kai. "Good night.... You big cuddle-addicted softie...." 

Takao murmured and kissed Kai's forehead softly, before closing his stormy blue eyes again. 

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**-End-**

Man, was that sappy and fluffy! Review? 

asa-chan 


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